Dating in Brazilian Culture … “she will think you are not interested”
Did you know that in Rio de Janeiro people kiss twice for greeting while in San Paule only once? A unique kissing etiquette that exists only in Brazil! In this article, we will look at this and many other cultural aspects that will help you to understand the Brazilian dating culture.
What do you need to know before dating in Brazil?
Veronica P. tells about diversity within the country:
“Brazil is veryyyyy big so it depends a lot on where you live in the Northeast ppl are very open-minded and fluid, especially in bigger cities. In the south (generally) people are more closed up on religious values and sexism. Politics affect a lot the dynamics of dating/marriage. Red states (lefty) tend to be generally more open-minded right states are more religious and close-minded and strict to “traditional family” which means getting married really young.“
Michael A.
“I am Brazilian I will give you one more bonus piece of information. If someone asks a Brazilian: ‘Are you fine?’, we will always say: ‘Yes’. Even if we have lost an arm haha. Because we don’t like to worry others with our problems or we are too lazy to explain the reason for our troubles.”
Dating a Brazilian Man
Dating a Brazilian man has some similarities with dating a Mexican man because the machismo culture is also present here.
Dating a Brazilian Woman
Juan H. thinks that girls there are more confident and a bit jealous:
“I lived in many countries and can say Brazilian women are more confident than any other in the world, which is a great thing. Dressing-wise, sex-wise, relationship...If you are Brazilian and not jealous, you are an exception. One in a million. Never met a girl who wasn’t, some on a crazy level, some on a cute level.“
In the video below two American men share their experience of dating Brazilian women:
Gender Roles. Who Initiates?
Noelle B. tells that society is quite traditional:
“Definitely, male-dominated. Lots of Brazilian men expect the woman to stay at home with the kids, to cater to their needs. Gender roles are strong here. You gotta find that one guy that is not threatened by a woman that makes more money and expects him to take care of the household and baby 50/50. But when you find that rare one, take good care of him and never let go.”
PDA and Kissing Culture in Brazil
Brazilian dating culture means openness about feelings: public displays of affection are so natural and common that there is not even a special word or expression to describe it in Portugees. Couples usually are very passionate about showing their affection, so it’s common to see people kissing in public.
Ricardo C. compares Brazilians and Canadians:
“My wife is Canadian and I’m Brazilian. Her friends think it’s so cute that we always walk holding hands, but to me, that’s pretty much the only way couples walk around together. If a man and a woman walk just side by side in Brazil, they are probably just friends. I always take a long time to understand when couples in Canada are couples because they stay so far from each other.“
Bruna R. tells that people tend to have more physical closeness (just like in Spanish culture):
“Brazilians in general like to touch a lot, even in conversations with strangers we are used to putting a hand on the person’s shoulders. It’s not something strange in a culture, where people are uses to talking with hand gestures. And if they are dating, public displays of affection is totally fine, and to be honest who on earth doesn’t like a bit of cuddle to know that you’re important to someone?“
If you are used to official handshakes or strict head nods, then you might be surprised by people giving kisses (beijo) to each other on the streets, in cafes, in parks…everywhere! This is the usual way people greet each other, no matter whether they see you for the first time or you are good friends.
Caio B. explains that there are even regional differences in Brazilian kissing culture:
“In San Paulo or Minas Gerais, you kiss once. In Rio de Janeiro you kiss twice. In Rio Grande do Sul you kiss three times. If you’re unsure of how many kisses to give, it’s fine to default to just one.“
So, if you are in Brazil be ready to kiss your friends, friends of your friends or even relatives of your boyfriend/girlfriend.
5 Rules for the First Date in Brazilian Dating Culture
1) Punctuality
Dating in Brazilian culture is more relaxed than in some European countries. If the date says he/she will pick you up at 9 pm don’t expect that person to be at your home at that time. So, if you are used to dating in Germany (or any Scandinavian country), don’t be offended by it, at least try not to show your irritation directly.
Debora N’s advice:
“Try not to bother or be upset if she is late for a date… She was probably getting really pretty for you! So please compliment her, and don’t complain.”
2) What to wear?
Looking too casual may even offend your date. Brazilians like to dress up, no matter if it is a romantic meeting or a party with their friends. So dress up to ensure you don’t feel awkward for being underdressed.
3)Topics
Be polite, don’t talk too much about work/income/politics, and don’t ask too personal questions. Furthermore, there are some questions that all Brazilians are sick of hearing, so avoid them.
4) Kissing on the first date
Definitely, YES. If you like him/her, in Brazilian dating culture you need to show your feelings. Being reserved, serious and cold is seen as a complete disinterest from your side. Probably, the second date will never happen. So, if your heart tells you that it’s a suitable moment for the kiss, don’t waste it!
Mariana A. advice to be honest and straightforward:
“Brazilian women expect the man to call after the first date. We really do not like ‘games’, we want the man to show interest straight away”
5) A Brazilian man will never let a girl go back home alone after the date
It’s a good idea to take her home. She may refuse at first but it’s expected that you offer again.
Benjamin L. explains that it applies not only to dating in Brazilian culture:
“In Brazilian culture, it’s not polite to accept something the first time it’s offered like if you are at someone’s house so they expect that you will insist and then it’s polite to accept. In Brazil insisting for someone to accept is also polite and shows you are really willing to do what you are offering.”
However, sometimes “no” means “no”. Learn to read between lines and don’t be too pushy. Respect comes first!
Dating in Brazilian Culture: Relationships Phase
One of our contributors Greg T. gave a short piece of advice:
“Learn the difference between ‘ficar’ and ‘namorar’ “
Brazilians are good at flirting, giving compliments and are very easy at giving kisses. However, it doesn’t indicate the seriousness of their intentions. Unlike dating in Korean culture, or dating in Chinese culture it doesn’t mean you are a couple. In Brazilian dating culture, the concept “ficar” means you are not in a relationship, but it also doesn’t mean you are not;) Brazilians often use it to refer to a casual intimate encounter that may or may not lead to sex. The person they are having such casual encounters with is called “contatinho” or “ficante”. Funnily, “contatinho” literally may also mean a contact in your phone, so it’s just one of many others on the list.
It is something to keep in mind for a foreigner. Dating in Brazilian culture may be confusing for people of more conservative Eastern cultures.
Namorar – committed romantic relationship with someone when you are “official”. Once, you are “namorar” your Brazilian partner will act like you are the centre of his/her universe, sometimes could be even possessive and jealous.
Also, be ready to meet a family soon. It’s an indispensable part of Brazilian life. It’s unreal how close the family is and how much everyone knows about each other and spend time together.
Brazilian Dating Apps
Brazilian dating culture doesn’t rely on technology, because people prefer to meet each other organically: through common friends, at parties, at work, etc.
Kyle P. explains why apps are not so popular:
“I asked my friends if they did online dating. He said, ‘No way man, we already meet way too many people, to begin with’.
Latin cultures are marked by a lot of get-togethers, meet-ups, dancing, and people introducing people to people. Cousins, aunts and uncles are generally a lot closer in these countries so you’d probably have the opportunity to meet people through them. There are more opportunities to meet people in general.
There is sometimes less trust in strangers so this could be a factor as well.”
However, if you prefer to connect with people online first here is a list of the most popular Brazilian dating apps according to similarweb:
1. Tinder
2. Badoo
3. Dating and Chat – SweetMeet
4. Dating and Chat – Evermatch
5. Dating with singles – iHappy
Thank you for reading our article on dating in Brazilian culture! Hope it answered your possible questions. Let us know your thoughts in the comments below!