Dating in Greek Culture “…this keeps a spark in a relationship!”
Did you know that Greece welcomes twice as many tourists than their own population is every year? So you have pretty high chances of ending up in this beautiful, sunny country one day. Therefore, you need to be prepared… let’s talk about dating in Greek culture.
What do you need to know before dating a Greek person?
Greeks tend to be very expressive individuals and often show all kinds of feelings clearly without fear or hesitation.
Anna L. says that Greeks are flirtatious (just like people are in French dating culture), but more conservative than some of their other European neighbours:
“Greeks like to flirt but they also like to be cocky. So if that is offensive to you, you shouldn’t date a Greek. Women really aren’t close to the European ‘feminist’ newly developed culture. Greek Women like to be Women and treated like Women and Greek Men like to be reminded of how Manly they are, so if you have a date with a Greek guy or a Greek girl you should act just a bit old-fashioned rather than new-wave-feminism, and equality etc which can really destroy a date with a Greek person.”
Jörgos K. A. thinks that dating in Greek culture is not monolithic and may vary greatly:
“In Greece, dating varies from traditional to Nordic-like. Greeks value the family, but very few depend on the family’s approval. The male-female stereotype exists but is not so strong; in general, Greek society is a fairly accepting society.”
David W. tells how Greeks’ temper affects their style of dating:
“We have a huge ego and many of us like to show off, speak loud, and make a lot of noise. So that’s how the date should be – full of energy and not too romantic and too boring.“
Dating a Greek man
Gia S. explains how Greek men differ from American men:
“In a relationship, I find them to be more romantic and more in touch with their feelings than American men but sometimes oversensitive. They sometimes can be possessive and try to act like they are the girl’s father so setting boundaries from the beginning is important.“
Dobrawa K. warns that Greek men may consider foreign girls as “easy”:
“Greek men would think they can have quicker sex with foreign women. We’re not all like that. And Greek men, in my experience dating men from all over, are uniquely and rapidly assertive in trying to have sex. It borders on obscene at times. I had an experience a few times where they said they don’t date Greek women because they think they are ‘princesses’. Seems like they get zero-effort sex from tourists and got used to it… Tourists spoiled them badly”.
Interestingly, many female foreigners had a similar impression while dating in Korean culture.
An old proverb is saying that the man is the “head” while the woman is the “neck” turning that head (it is a line from the Bible). It matches with the Greek approach to dating and relationships.
William S. confirms that:
“Most men even if they try to play macho actually respect women a lot. And about them having the upper hand? Hahaha, that’s a joke. They might want to have the upper hand but it’s always the woman that has the control.”
Phoebe F. confirms
“Most Greek men expect women to be their caregivers/mothers/emotional support crutches. This is what the society expects. You may be a fully-fledged person in your own right but the moment you get a boyfriend, it’s over. You are each other’s ball and chain.”
Dating a Greek woman
Dimitrios K. describes Greek girls:
“Greek women are socially very confident, flirty, talkative, jealous, pay too much attention to how they look, gossip a lot… and like to take care of a man. They can be manipulative in order to test how alpha a man is, and love fights because this keeps a spark in a relationship. Eventually, they want to marry, start a family and have kids.“
Vince E. says that a Greek woman often expects to find a reliable man’s shoulder:
“Greek women are the opposite of Anglo-Saxon women. In my humble opinion, they are generally more needy…Old style. Greek women are not easy, play hard to get, and will need several dates before doing anything…
Rigópoula T. joked on Quora that Greeks (especially their mums!) may be reluctant to tie the knot with a foreigner:
“Greek girl: There are so many fish in the sea, do I have to marry a Greek?
Greek mother: You better be talking about the Aegean Sea!
This is the mentality I grew up with.”
Gender roles while dating in Greek culture
Gender roles are often traditional. It makes the Greek dating scene similar to many African countries (for example, dating in Nigerian culture).
Barathi M. confirms:
“In this country, Greek men want a woman that cooks, takes care of children and doesn’t earn more than him. Of course, there are exceptions but this is a big difference in Greece.”
Who initiates?
Nevertheless, it would be wrong to generalize all Greeks. There are a lot of exceptions depending on age, social status, life experience, etc.
Jörgos K. A. tells that dating in Greek culture is changing with time:
“Greek women are becoming more independent, the younger ones are not very much into macho types, and they have no problem telling a guy to go out if they find him interesting. I don’t think that the hunter-prey issue applies in Greece as much as decades ago.”
First Date
Relationships are developing naturally and are expected to be exclusive from the beginning. The first date will never be a job interview style like some people describe the American dating scene. Anna L. confirms that the notion of “dating” is rather vague in Greece:
“I don’t think that Greeks even date, to begin with. Most of us are so straightforward that we might end up kissing the girl (or boy for girls) that we like from the first day or night that we meet them (if they give us the chance). So planning a date is rare and scary for a Greek. We don’t like dates, we prefer going out for a walk or going out to eat with friends and then the guy with the girl might leave the company and go for a stroll themselves.“
Family & Marriage in Greek Culture
Greek people often live with their parents until a later age than the rest of Europe. There is a stereotype that parents, especially mothers, play an important role. Let’s look on what our contributors say about it.
Sabrina W.
“In recent years cohabiting before marriage has become more of an okay thing and it is extremely common for you as a woman to move in with his whole family. That is common, they usually live all together or next to each other. The men leave home very late. Or never :)…It’s more common here to get pregnant fast. And marry when the baby is 2 or 3 years old.“
Giota D. breaks some stereotypes:
“Yes, we live with our parents till our marriage. It’s convenient, we save money, that’s the reason. If we can afford a home of our own, we part.
No, the father does not decide about our marriage. He might have a negative opinion of our sweethearts but … he can do nothing. And yes, we marry foreigners without forcing them to change their religion, their eye colour or whatever!
Yes, our parents help us a lot ( if they can ) when we start our own lives. They finance our studies, maybe co-finance a house when we get married.“
Effie Z. assures that Greek in-laws would never stay in the way of their children to marry a foreigner:
“The majority of Greek-American mothers would not reject a “xeni” (foreigner or non-Greek oriented) if she or he at least agreed to bring up the kids sharing traditional Greek values and recipes (yepp). Like all women in the world, Greek mothers too want their children to be happy no matter the origin of the person. “
We hope you liked our article on dating in Greek culture. Would be happy to see your thoughts in the comments section.
Huh. Turns out that Greeks and Asians basically share the same dating norms. All this makes way more sense to me.
This is very interesting! My friend is dating a Greek man and he is lovely. My husband is Thai and I see a lot of similarities in what you have written, interesting!